This past weekend was full of HIGHS and lows. It was one of the most fun weekends I have had in a while but there were a few down points that capped the weekend that were pretty big lows for me. Friday morning me and the kids are driving to the lake. While I am driving and the kids are watching a movie I decide to catch up on a couple of phone calls. Well these phone calls were about adoption. Basically I found out on Friday morning that we (my family) were shot down TWICE. Ok, not literally shot down but we were not chosen, which is a form of being denied. One was through Bethany and one was through someone at our church that knew someone who knew someone who knew someone…you get the idea. Well this just really hit me. I silently cried out to God as I was driving “WHY?” Why does he want us to adopt? Why have we not been chosen? Let’s just be real here folks. I am done being patient. I want a baby. I am tired of getting e-mails about potential babies (birth moms giving up their babies) and then the birth mom not choosing us. I mean, I thought we were in this because there was a NEED? Is there not really a need? Nathan and I can have babies still, we are doing this because we feel called to do this but I am just tired of it. Unfortunately I do still feel called to adopt. I don’t feel like we should give up hope. I have been praying for patience and trust though. I will continue to pray and would love for y’all to pray too. I have been honest through this process and I want to continue. Keepin it real y’all.
Moving on. After some tears we arrive at the lake. Yay! The water and sun can make almost anything better in my opinion! I wish the lake wasn’t two hours away! I grew up with a pool in my backyard and a lake with a boat fifteen minutes away. I was one lucky girl, that is for sure! Well this weekend part of our community group joined Nathan, the kids and I are Nathan’s parents lake house. I am so thankful they let us and our friends use the lake for a weekend. Friday afternoon the McCarty family and Jennifer (a recently graduated college student) joined us first, Nathan joined us right before dinner time and Jake and Haley Lane joined us later that night. We hung out and the kids played while the adults cooked and talked. After dinner we made S’MORES! Hadley and Noah’s first experience with the graham cracker, chocolate, marshmallow goodness. Hadley enjoyed it. Noah did not. He enjoyed his s’mores raw :)
That night the girls enjoyed talking while the boys enjoyed fishing.
In the morning after breakfast we were ready to hit the water! We had such a fun day! We tubed, wake boarded (I did both), found a turtle, swam, rode the boat, all sorts of fun stuff!
After a full day in the sun we were ready to relax with some yummy dinner. Once the kids were asleep the adults played some games and then we hit the hay too. I was such a weenie and the first adult asleep both nights. No shame. I need my sleep.
Sunday we woke up and did the same thing basically. Just after lunch we left and headed back to Fayetteville. We had such an amazing weekend. I loved getting to relax and hang out with our friends. I got to know them better and just really enjoy some down time.
On our way home, Noah rode with me and when we got back to town I went and picked up the dogs from the kennel. We came home and I let them in the back yard. Well I could tell immediately something was wrong so I called the dogs back inside. When I went looking after the dogs were inside I saw two of our chickens were out of the coop and one was NOT doing well at all. I looked to make sure the other two were still in the coop and then went and checked on Penelope, the one that wasn’t doing well. Well, little did I know but Penelope was in the verge of dying, I picked her up and moved her out of the sun and checked her out. I didn’t see any puncture wounds but I had no clue what was wrong with her. After a couple of minutes she died. It was just me and Noah at home so I tried my best to hold it together and we went out front to meet Nathan. Oh, the chickens were out of food. I think that is why two of them, the little two, dug out. I gave the chickens food, put Rosie back in the coop and THEN went to wait for Nathan and Hadley. Hadley REALLY likes the chickens. She named them all and she is zoo good with them. She is better than me with them. Well, I told Nathan right when he got out of the car that Penelope was dead and he needed to go to the backyard, I would get Hadley out. He did. Then I went out there and joined him and the kids stayed inside for a bit. Soon, we let them come out, and we told Hadley. She was sad but handled it better than I thought. I kind of think kids don’t fully understand death though. She is sad but not to the point of crying out, emotions flowing, wailing. She is too young I guess, and that can be good. Soon I did cry, I was the one wailing. I balled into Nathan’s arms and he held me. I love my animals and did not want one to die. We are not sure why she died. Maybe Digger got her before I called him in, maybe another animal, maybe sickness, we aren’t sure but my heart is still broken. What an emotional roller coaster of a weekend right?
Well that night Nathan and I already had plans to go see Old Crow Medicine Show at the Amp. I was not in the mood at all but was looking forward to this. This was Nathan and my first date outside of kamp. We saw OCMS in Mountain View, Arkansas 8 years ago. A completely different group of people at this show and the one 8 years ago I tell you. Still a great show though.
What a weekend!!!! The goods were very good but the lows were very sad. Looking forward to a much lower key weekend this weekend!